Dealing with First Dates

First dates… They never get old. No matter how many times you’ve been through them or how many years of dating experience that you have in your bag. It never gets any less nerve-racking. Yes, even for the men! It involves first impressions, awkward conversations etc.

Here’s someone who you might endup being serious with or not… you have to make a good impression, you want your date to like you, you want your date to look for a second date… the pressure!p

It’s one situation that most people would rather avoid but unfortunately, it’s what you might call inevitable. That is, if you don’t want to remain single and searching for too long.

There are a few tips to make the first date a little less awkward and help you get that date to commit to another. Here they are:

It should not be for too long: 2 hours is more than enough. This is a first meeting (No, social media doesn’t count!). As much as you might want to know everything about each other, that’s what the other dates are for. Two hours is more than enough to get enough information to help you decide if you want another or not

Topics of discussion: Think over the things that matter to you when it comes to having a partner in your life (Refer to past mistakes and learn from them), think of what you appreciate the most in others, think of what excites you in a person. These are where your questions should come from. No need to be serious about them or interrogating them like a police officer but it is important that you get answers to your questions to avoid wasting your time and theirs’ as well

What to wear: Don’t ever try to over-impress or under-impress. Hence, don’t whip out that new dress or those new shoes or that faded shirt that you wear all day, every day. Be comfortable. Comfort is key while recognizing that you dress how you want to be addressed.

Body Language: Pay attention to this. It happens unconsciously hence, the tendency to fail on this can be really high. A lot of people give off negative body language when they find themselves in uncomfortable situation and end up leaving others with the wrong impression about them. Here are a few common ones that can’t send out the wrong message.

-Learn the art if you must but don’t avoid eye contact. Having eyes that look all over the place can come off as disinterest even though you might just be uncomfortable.

– Don’t put your hand over your mouth.

-Don’t sit with your legs stretched out carelessly or your hands behind your head.

-Don’t keep your phone on the table and keep picking it up or fiddling with it every two seconds

-Don’t play with your hair

Be yourself (CONFIDENTLY): If you are proud of yourself, you will be yourself and have your date take it or leave it. You might feel the pressure but it won’t slightly be as much as the one that doesn’t feel comfortable with himself and therefore tries to be someone else. The best way to conquer a first date is by being you in full

Be open to rejection: Here’s another reason why people get uneasy and mess up or give up even before the date has begun. The what-if-they-don’t-like-me-speech. So what? Whenever you hear that thought, your answer should be ‘So what?’ So what if someone somewhere decided that they can’t see themselves with you, does that mean that you’re not good enough?

First dates are never the most comfortable or remotely easy dates but sometimes, they’re all you need to get out and get involved.

SOURCE: GREENNEWS.NG